In-laws and Out-laws

Have you ever had a mother-in-law you didn't like? The sit-coms portray mothers-in-law as aweful, ugly intruders whose goal in life (since her daughter married "that idiot") is to pray to the gods and call down a thousand pleagues upon the son-in-law.

I remember hearing that my mom's mother (who is now with Jesus since May 2008) showed up at the wedding wearing black in order to make a statement. The story has it that she hated my dad until the last 10-15 years of her life. I remember the turmoil our two families had growing up. I remember that was the reason dad moved us from California to Texas in 1976.

Growing up, I hoped that I would not end up in a relationship with my mother-in-law like the one my dad had with his. My grandmother use to tell me that "we are products of our environment". She was stating that to me is a negative way, implying that it had something to do with my dad. Anyway, if what she said is true, people should be able to tell what their in-laws will be like by getting to know the potential life-long partner and looking for these things. Watching them interact with their parents, etc.

As I was getting to know my future wife, I was also getting to know her parents and the family dynamics they have. The more I got to know my wife the better understanding I gained into the lives of my in-laws. I can honestly say with a heart of gratitude that I got a better deal out of our union. My in-laws are awesome loving people.

Although my in-laws are devoted Catholics and I am not (I am a devoted believer an follower of the Lord Jesus Christ that they would call a "Protestant") they loved and accepted me (they entire family did-aunts, uncles, cousins, and family priest!). It was for who I was and not for what I could become. They never imposed expectations on me that I felt I had to live up to or else I was an utter failure. They treated me and Tanya as an adult married couple with respect. They supported us in our ever-developing parenting style as we became parents. They allowed us to "grow up" and grow in our relationship.

They were there for us when the storms of life were battering against us pretty hard. They were FOR us and FOR our marriage. I've not felt a single ounce of condemnation from them...even though I've made mistakes as a husband, father, and Christian. They seem to have the understanding that there is only One who is worthy to sit in the judgment seat and it's not any of us.

Pictured above is Stephanie Gager (pronounced "gay-jer"). As with anyone, she makes mistakes and can get on your nerves at times (can't we all? - I love you Mimi!). What makes her special to me is that she LOVES to LOVE people and I am one of those people she loves. And although technically I fit into the "in-law" category, I've never felt like the typical "in-law". She's always treated me as she does her own son. I appreciate that and I am SO blessed to have in-laws who love and accept me into their family as one of there own.

I don't have a photo of my father-in-law but he's something else to. He and I have not crossed over the border together and become best buds (yet), but there is a love and respect for me that comes from him. Eventhough we disagree about the Apostle Peter becoming the first pope in catholic history (love you Paw-paw), we agree on so much more that helps hold the family together and positions us to build and leave a godly heritage for generations to come. Only LOVE does that! not man's love...God's Holy Love. God's love and take people with differences and mesh them together in untiy for the common good. He has done that with all of us! It's so amazing!

Karl Gager, Sr. loves his three children and all 17 grandchildren and his pride swells when we're all around him. He's awesome.

I know some in-laws have become more like out-laws...but when it comes to my wifes parents, even if the law had nothing to do with it, I'm IN! I'm one of theirs!

Thanks be to God for His glorious blessings!